It's something I'll have to address sooner or later.
All I really have to say on the issue is this- God made pot, Man made beer.
Who do you trust.


AND ON TO OTHER THINGS-

Worked from 10:45am to 10pm today. Shit, what a long day. And the best part is that when I left I was still in an awesome mood. The traffic at the restaraunt was relative, nothing that I couldn't handle, and as usual the only time I got super slammed was right after my break after they all had neglected my orders while I was trying to rest. I don't know, I doubt if I would hesitate to take another one of these shifts, but my wrist is certainly sore.
Ice cream all day will do that, I guess.
I walked around and sang all day, all sorts of stuff, but of course, it got better when Ben arrived. Ben and I just have so much fun!!! Not to mention that Ali was working too, which meant that the A team was in effect. It was fantastic. I had a really good day.

(Ali, Ben in midjump, and myself, of the A-Team.)

But of course, there is always something to bitch about.
Number one.
Gerry.
He drove me in almost all the way to work today, which, don't get me wrong, I appreciate to the fullest. The unfortunate part of that was that I was stuck listening to him. A lot of the time I have no peoblem with it, but there are days when he just gets on his high horse.... He's very opinionated, and that I don't mind so much, as it makes for interesting conversations. I learn things about people by listening to them rant. Its something I enjoy quite a bit. At any rate, today was different. And I'm ot sure how it started, or what I did to prevoke him.. However.. Here is my favourite quote of the day.
"I am constantly using you as a bad example for the girls."
I gotta tell you, something in my heart just soared hearing him say that I'm his bad example. I'm his example of a life gone wrong. Its the kind of thing that I let roll off my back in one way, because he's just got a surface look at me clouded by a whole crapload of assumptions... But at the same time, it hurts my feelings. Plain and simple, thats what it does. Because I'm not a bad person.
Of course, he doesn't mean me by my personality. What he means is that my job is an example. He went on to explain himself further, which is probably why I didn't hit him or start crying or something.
What he said after that was that a ten year old kid can go anywhere, can be anything he or she wants. That all the doors are open, and as you get older your doors start to close, and some of those doors are damned near impossible to reopen.
I guess, I get what he's saying.. But no one in my family ever speaks down to me based on my chosen profession.
So I'm a pot smoking highschool drop out. For God's sake, I support myself and three cats, I live alone, I've held down a steady fulltime job at the same place for three years. So, screw saying I have no dedication, that was never the problem. It's dedication strictly to where my interests lie, and my interests did not lie in school in a conventional sense.
He doesn't seem to give me any credit. I follow politics, I know all the lyrics to all the music he listens to, I'm cultured, friendly, I have awesome social skills... Everybody likes me... except Gerry. But I'll just have to charm harder.
I keep trying to find things we have in common, or at the very least opinions that we can discuss in a logical manner, he just doesn't seem to be interested in what we have in common... Only taking me down a few pegs.
I don't even dare mention my religion to him.
Sometimes we'll be talking and I'll mention something about me that he's yet to have learned, and he just looks at me like I'm lying to him, "Really?!!?!" he'll say...
Like it's impossible that I might have some neat little characteristics that he hasn't assumed I have already. Like, tonight he was listening to the radio and Peggy Lee's Fever came on.. I was singing and told him that I used to swing dance, that indeed I did for four years.. He was staring in disbelief at me...
Like, do you think I made it up? No, believe it or not I have a life and interests seperate from the stereotype you, for whatever reason, have placed me into.
GRRRR.
Said I'm never gunna be lonely....
I wanna be a lion.
everybody wanna pass this cat
Cuz we all wanna be big big stars
yeh
but we got different reasons for that

Oh well. He's M's dad, and I have to deal with him.
But fuck. I feel like I am being lectured and I'm not used to it, nor do I like it. Period.
And I've not often before felt like I don't want to challenge someone's opinion or correct them where they may be wrong. It's not like me. He brings out the not like me in me. Like... WTF?
Am I this desperate for approval? And the sad part is that I know the answer to that question before I even ask it.
Yes. I am that starving for approval. Which makes me a fucking loser. Hooray!

I dunno when CreationFest is this year, but I can't afford to go, which sucks, but at the same time. Second year in a row I'm gunna miss it, and I'm really not as upset as I was last year.




Me before my twelve hour shift today.... Or, eleven hours and fifteen minutes thank you very much. I've been playing with new makeup styles.. Meh, I thought I looked okay this morning.


This is after a twelve hour shift. Not terrible, if I do say so myself.


And this last one made me laugh my ass off.
stupid hair in my face.
And I don't even notice it anymore.

And because I whined so much, I feel like 6 ain't enough. Photo whorin' it up as per usual.






And that is all for tonight my darling reader beans.
Sleep tight.
Don't let the bed bugs bite.


For the record, "Terr Bear" is my best friend since third grade. Not just someone who reads my blog. Only four people I know in real life know about this blog.